Parental controls for my child.

Well, I got my daughter a phone. I also have three other children that will get phones. I told all my kids that I will buy them a cell phone when they go into sixth grade.

I am looking for some sort of phone control software. It doesn't need to be hidden because I told her that I will install it on the phone.

She has my old iPhone 5 for the past year but she gets frustrated because it doesn't have enough storage and the screen is only four inches. I may get her a cheaper android phone.

She currently uses iMessage and texting. Right now she is a well behaved girl because she is just starting out her teenage years, but I know we have a lot more years to go. Also, there is a lot of trust between us as well as very little attitude, just the occasional rolling of the eyes, then she is quick to apologize when I let her know she is being disrespectful. She asked for Snapchat, but I told her no because other people can use it to cyber bully and the erase it.

I told also told her that I am going to install something where I can see anything people send her in case if anyone sends her something that we need to save. I also told her that accountability keeps us out of trouble and minimizes heartache, which is why me and my wife know all each other's private life, both in real life and online, and that as she gets to be an older teen, she will probably be tempted to do bad things. Our entire family has an internet only in the living room policy, but with a phone, that is not practical.

I guess I am rambling, but being the dad of a 12 year old is scary. I have been nothing but honest with her and as open as age appropriate. We also have three more chikdren between 10 and 7. My point is that I want to install something that can restrict apps, filter the internet, as well as monitor messages and email. I don't think this is unreasonable because even my wife and I know that our lives are open between each other. (If anything, it's just convent because we have reminded each other of stuff or passed messages.)

So, anyone have any experience using these types of software. I have looked at several pieces of software, but nothing seams to stand out.

 

Thank you. I will use the Tom's guide. As of right now we are focusing on communication. I know that I am walking a fine line here because we have a great relationship right now, and she knows that it is not her that I don't trust, but other people. I have also told her that the teenage years are the hardest time in a persons life because their brains common sense are telling her one thing, but her emotions and hormones will be telling her something else. That is why we all need personal accountability.

I am just not exactly sure of what to do or how to do it. But I think I have a good idea. For now I will skip the spy software. We use the iPhones parental controls. She has already asked for snapchat and I told her no because if it automatically deletes messages then it opens up a door for other people, especially bullies, to do her harm. Instead I found a similar app that allows her to use the photo features she likes.

As far as monitoring, I have pointed out that both me and my wife keep an open online life, and that is the same thing as monitoring. I have also given them permission to see all of my online life.

If I know where she is and who she is with, that should be enough.